Leave margin space for what matters

In the Power of Moms Retreat that I attended last week, we discussed Nurturing the 'Me' in Mom.

We also talked about ideas from the book by Richard Swanson, Margin: Restoring Emotion, Physical, Financial and Time Reserves to Overloaded Lives.

The baby is crying, dinner is boiling over on the stove, your son spills his milk on the floor which you manage to hurtle over just in time to answer the ringing phone and respond to the caller (lying through your teeth) that, 'No, I'm not busy,  I would love to do that for you."

In my unconventional life, marginless living looks like stuffing every square inch of our truck full of stuff 'just in case', pushing on through the night  to 'make good time', and packing every day full of non-stop adventure.

We need to give ourselves space to breath. We need to allow (even schedule) time to just 'do nothing' and enjoy 'being'.

The 'white space' in your life is defined by the amount of time, money, emotion and energy available beyond what is necessary.

How do you decide what is 'necessary'? Necessary items include only what you need to survive.

The things you need to spend time on include:

• Feeding/eating
• Sleeping
• Bathing/grooming
• Quality time

Beyond that, we should deliberately choose what activities we're willing to commit our precious resources to.

"Balance is neglecting everything just a little bit."

Many mothers pride themselves on being able to multi-task. But multi-tasking is not always a virtue.

Taking on too much - too much stuff, too many tasks, too many obligations and promises, too many activities - just leads to overload.

Overload leads to becoming a circus juggler, who usually ends up dropping the balls.

It also means you miss out on 'relaxing time' to do things like play tag with your kids, share a treat in the grass, or read a story at bedtime.

To 'get back to basics', ask yourself:

What do I need to get rid of? (More than just belongings, what activities, commitments, projects?)

Practice 'zero-base' thinking. If you could start over right now, what would you definitely eliminate from your life?

What would I like to make room for in my life? (Ask yourselves these questions to see what passions you would like to pursue.)

By eliminating the unnecessary, learning to say 'no', and prioritizing what's really important, you can learn to enjoy the simple pleasures of life instead of living as an out of control air-traffic controller.

How do you create 'margin' space in your life? What difference has it made?

Interested in a monthly virtual meetup to discuss Deliberate Motherhood? 

Topics would include:

• Family Systems - legal/discipline & economy
• Strengthening Family Identity
• Finding 'Me' Time to Be a Better Mom
• Mothering on the Road
• Finding Joy in Motherhood
• Much More

Sign up below if interested.

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